Monday, May 31, 2010

Leaving on a Jetplane?

Guess what I did as soon as I got my tickets to Chennai? I wrote or rather I started singing "I am leaving on a Jet plane" with a few changes. You have to read it in the same tune as song. Try it and call me crazy. :D

All my bags are packed and I am ready to come
I am standing here, outside my door,
I would love to wake you up and say hello.

The dawn is breaking. It's early morn,
The taxi is waiting, blowing its horn.
Already I am so excited, I can't rhyme.

So kiss me and wait for me
And tell you wont be late for me
and hold me like you'll never let me go...
Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane....


It was 1 am when she left work. She got into the car. She checked the mirror. Her makeup was perfect as was her business suit. Not a crease anywhere. It was perfect. Perfection is what she aimed for. In her work. In everything she did. She started the car. It didn’t start. Once again. The car had given up on her. Just like her life had. The fuel tank was empty just like her house, her heart.

There was no point in trying to start the car now. She decided to walk home. She started walking. It started to rain. DAMN. She cursed under her breath. But did she have a choice? Her heel broke. Double DAMN. She picked her shoes in her hand.

Frustration and irritation creasing her forehead. Within her, yet, there was streak to make things perfect once again. All she had to do was reach home. She challenged the rain, “Try all you want. I will get home. SAFE.” She laughed and thought loneliness had gotten to her. Did she just talk to the rain? Hmm.

As she walked, she didn’t feel the dread you feel walking barefoot on a lonely road on a rainy day. She felt liberated. As each drop touched her body, she felt a sense of serenity, a calm feeling like that of a lover’s touch. She felt her makeup melt away. She felt her mask peel away. She felt naked. She felt like her. As her eyeliner was getting washed away, she felt her vision clearing up.

She felt free. Free from responsibilities. Free from having to keep up. Free from demons within. She saw the dust covered leaves being cleansed by the rains, being liberated by the weight of the un-needed. She felt the same weight being lifted off her. She was herself again. Once again ready to take on the world the way as herself, the way she was, not what she had become!

Submitted to Tales Thursday

Friday, May 28, 2010

Dear you.

A - I think you are awesome. I am so glad that you are in my life. Let's see this through, now, shall we?

B - I miss you. I hate that you are so far away and that I haven't seen you in years but I love the way we have stayed friends. You mean a lot to me. Things happened. People changed. We changed. Our friendship didn't. Thanks.

C - I can't wait to see you again.

D - I am sorry to say this but I am glad things ended between us. I would never found happiness the way I did. I hope, someday soon you find happiness and find it in your heart to forgive me.

E - When I see your name, your pic or even when people mention you, I blush and have butterflies in my stomach. Just so you know.

F - I hate how things ended. We could have done so much better. Isn't there a way we can get back to the friends we used to be?

G - I have changed. I know the relationship we used to share but it isn't the same anymore. I am sorry that I am not the sister to you that I used to be.

H - I wish I could say something nice about him to you. But I can say is that if he makes you happy, I am happy. I don't wish to spend more time with you guys than absolutely necessary. I can make time for you whenever. Alone, only.

These are just some random things I wish I had the guts to tell certain people in my life. For some reason, I am unable to. If you are reading this, I hope you get my point, if not, maybe it is best left unsaid. 

In a good way or bad, thanks for being a part of my life. In some way, you made me who I am. 

Monday, May 24, 2010

Letter to life

Dear Life,

I know I write often to you and ask for things to be better. I know I am demanding and expect more out of you. But today, I write to you to say thank you. You've brought wonderful people into my life and even if nothing goes my way, I am happy for the way things currently are (touch wood).

Life, I know I will still ask for things. I know I will still want you to be better. But I want you to know that it is only because I know that when you and me are together,we can definitely change things. We need not rely on stupid things like fate or luck.

That is all for now. Once again, thank you. :)

Your partner in crime,

Friday, May 21, 2010

Rant - 2

Things have changed and maybe, for the good. People that formed an integral part of my life, I kinda find them irritating now. People I yearned to talk to, I care not much anymore. I fail to realise if this is a good thing. But I guess, this is what people call moving on.

I am sorry that I don't reply to your pings or seem like a different person. I know you did no wrong to me, not intentionally, at least. But I am in a different place and I like the place I am in. Somehow, you don't fit in here. I am civilized with you but somehow, it feels wrong after the amazing relationship we shared.

I am not really sorry that I moved on but I feel weird that you got left behind. Maybe someday, we'll make peace and find a way to patch things. Till then, I would appreciate just being in touch and not continuously asking me what is wrong. I hope you understand. You always have in the past.


Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Rant- 1

Today, I realised that I have there are people who love me. Some people who will stick by me no matter what. People who care for me just because I am me. I can screw up, completely change or whatever, they will still love me and care for me.

It is because of such people that to the rest of the world, I can say, bring it on! It is because of them, I can look fear in the eye. Even with hundreds of responsibilities, I feel weightless. It is surprising that when I am feeling low, I always seem to ignore them.

Rule : Must not ignore those who love you. Care should be a 2 way street as much as possible.

Submitted to  3WW : Weightless, ignore, fear

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

I hate airports

There is something about the airports. I don't know why. I hate the energy there. Though I see people smiling and meeting up with their loved ones, there is something sad about that place. I have gone to pick up and I have gone to drop people. I have said goodbye and I have said hello. But the goodbye always outweigh the hello. I have this weird fear that I might never see them again. It is stupid and irrational but it is true.

Well, my most recent visit to the airport was to see off a friend. There is this feeling of dread. You hope the flight is late. You hope that something goes wrong. Yet there is something that tells you that it isn't going to be the last time. You know you will have to go through this over and over again, till one day, when it will over and that day, hopefully, shall be the day of joy.

Till that day, I shall be strong. Strong until I hear, "All my bags are packed and I am ready to go." Then, I run to get the tissues.